5 tips to help your child through divorce or separation

When parents decide to separate not only is this a stressful situation for the adults involved but also for the children in those families.

Separation may mean a child has to move away from their old home or area that they are used to; a change of schools; the loss of friends as well as not seeing one parent on a regular basis.

All of this can have a big impact on children so here are our top 5 tips to help them through this difficult time.

  1. Reassure them

Give them reassurance that the split isn’t their fault. They might believe that the reason you are separating is down to them and their behaviour.

  1. Communicate

Maintain communication with the other parent. Learn to be business like in your discussions. This will help you focus on reaching agreement for the sake of the children rather than your own arguments.

  1. Protect them

Try to protect children from adult worries and responsibilities. They will find it difficult to understand what you and the other parent are going through. There are often arguments going on about financial issues which the children don’t need to be aware of.

  1. See through their eyes

Consider things from the child’s point of view. They will already be faced with the prospect of one parent moving out of the family home and wondering what else may change. Try to keep to your usual routines and activities.

  1. Explain the situation

Children are entitled to know what is happening but need to be told in a child-friendly way. The level of information they need will depend on age and understanding of the situation. They also need to know that they can ask questions and discuss their fears with you.

There will always be cases where due to the risk of sexual, physical or emotional abuse you cannot implement any or all of these strategies. However, in most cases these tips should help you and your children survive the pain of divorce or separation.

For more information contact Michelle Simpson on 01663 743344 or e-mail

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